Day Four...

• Teri commented earlier she was uncertain if she was enjoying being the brunt of my blog fodder. I affectionately shared she merely is the "center of my attention".

• Big day--hysterectomy staple removal! In the interest of gas and co-pay savings, I offered Teri to sterilize my needle nose pliers, she declined. She also refused to join in with me on the following idea. I wanted to go down to the local magic shop and buy a spring-loaded parasite (think "The Alien" movie-remember this scene?). I wanted to tuck the prop below a huge bandage on her belly and when the nurse went to go remove the gauze pad-- LAUNCH TIME! She again declined. Teri's mom arrives in 5 days and I am telling her that her daughter does not play well with others.

• After the successful removal of 13 staples, we went out to Qdoba for lunch. Teri repeatedly and uncharacteristically raved about the naked burrito she was enjoying (Dr. said that was the only thing naked she could have for 6 weeks). I came home and looked up her enthusiastic behavior in our "Love Language Translator" guide--translated, "Wife despises husband's cooking". Who would of thunk?

• Nurse called tonight, pathology report all benign---praises!! They did find the fibroids after all. I guess my introverted wife had bashful 'roids as they were hiding inside the uterus.
  

• Back home to my housekeeping duties--our feather duster--someone missing their Punk Rock bird?

• Dinner tonight---Mexican Open Face Sammiches--yummy!

• I need your forgiveness in advance, but have to share this thought I had when I was in the surgical waiting room for 4 hours on Monday. You know many employers allow you to dress up for Halloween. How cool is this idea if you are a Recovery Room Nurse and are monitoring patients coming out of anesthesia--dress up as Jesus! Make sure you have a video camera as you could make some big bank submitting your results to various TV networks. Please be compassionate and fore go the costume for cardiac patients. I know what you are thinking, Dave needs more counseling. I will ask Dryer Ball therapist for a referral.

• Finally, should I be concerned? As I walked by Teri surfing the internet, I noticed she was logged in to WebMD.com--she was searching "MISTER-ectomy". That sounds bad for me, like I may be seeing the real Jesus soon...

Gotta run, like reallllly run (before she reads this)...